When learning and studying about cultures there's always stages people go through when experiencing a new place and culture. First,
The Honeymoon Stage
In this stage you hardly see any flaws. Everything is new and exciting! Differences aren't that big of a deal because you are so focused on learning all the new things and soaking it all in that the differences seem small. For me in Colombia this lasted pretty much for 2.5 years! (one year I was on the world race away from it but in my mind while I was away only thought of the good and beautiful parts of Colombia.) I mean I'm sure there were moments but I don't remember so many moments in my first year being here of being super frustrated with traffic, pollution, people, lack of punctuality, and difference in priorities. To me it was like "eh that's just how things are here and I want to learn more!" Plus I was really focused on just learning the language too. Culture Shock, Adjustment, & Adaption
are the following stages of the "culture shock curve." Since being back my role has changed and I'm more involved in the culture. My first year I lived with Americans, worked with Americans, and only saw Colombians on the weekends at church or occasionally for coffee. My focus was teaching and school...let alone it was my FIRST year of teaching which has it's own culture shock & survival mode in itself.
I didn't have to travel in public transportation often
Now going to the foundation, church, and to see Edwin I take public transportation which almost always consists of the infamous "trancon" traffic of Bogotá. (Also, it doesn't help Edwin lives 1.5 hours away in a bus but in miles it's only 18 miles! I'm so ready to be married and change that!)
I wasn't involved in many Colombian groups where I attend meetings
I'm involved in a couple groups at my Colombian church where we have meetings. Meetings here are different. Since they are a people first culture they talk about everything in life and take "breaks" during the meeting to drink coffee & eat a snack. This is definitely not a bad thing! Just not as efficient as the US culture I grew up in....1 hour meetings there take about 3-4 hours here. Again, not bad...just when you a used to something else it's difficult.
Punctuality...
Colombians acknowledge that they aren't the most punctual people. There are some things you need to be early to that are doctor's appointments, work, and important meetings. However, everything else that is personal or family/friends gatherings, and weddings it's a whole different story. It says it starts at 4pm but really that means 5:30/6pm. Traffic does play a role in this but it also can be a matter of priorities. If people are at a meeting or meeting up with someone they probably value it more important to stay and talk with that person than to be on time to the next event which consequently makes them late. To be honest part of this has rubbed off on me! When I was home in October I found myself acting more "Colombian." My mom said to go to the bridal shop a little after 10am. In my mind now a little after means I have a gap of 15 minutes to get there but in her mind a couple minutes means no later than 10:05! Ha...oops.
Also, I found it hilarious that at the camp I was just at this weekend each group had points to earn in different categoriesvand one category was punctuality. In my mind it was like "ok here are the times so be there on time and all the groups that are there before it starts you get a point." So once the first whistle blew for dinner EVERYONE started running to the dining room. I was so confused at what was going on. It was then I realized punctuality to them means "RUN AND THE FIRST GROUP THERE IS ON TIME!" :-)
I am not bashing Colombia's culture and I hope it hasn't come across that way. I've learned a bunch in premarital counseling with Edwin and our differences and how they aren't bad and actually can compliment each other. Shoot. I love Colombia. I'm MARRYING into this culture. I'm learning to adapt & adjust. It's not easy but as I was reading Isaiah tonight the Lord convicted me.
Isaiah 6:8 says, "And I heard the voice of the Lord saying, 'Whom shall I send, and who will go for us?' Then I said, "Here am I! Send me."
I made the choice 3 years ago to leave my family, friends, culture to come serve the beautiful people of Colombia (and latin america). I was willing 3 years ago to say "Here am I! Send me." In spite of cultural differences, in spite of pollution, traffic, punctuality, and customs that are not mine. Shoooot I've made a decision to marry into this culture! But unfortunately I had lost that "in spite of" focus and God is refocusing me on Him and His work He is doing here and renewing His love in me for these broken teenagers, single moms, and beautiful people that He created and has the desire and plan to REDEEM. I am here for the Lord. I AM willing to adjust and adapt to this culture and other cultures where God may take Edwin and I to share His gospel. I really don't think Colombia & the United States are the only countries God has on His list for us. So more culture shock cycles to come -- HOORAY! It's not easy but it's SO worth it!
So it's happened. I fell out of love with Colombia. (not to be mistaken with Edwin!) But God has used this time to show me that yes there are differences and I did not say it was going to be easy to follow Me but TRUST ME -- I am falling back into love with this country and recognize that there are things about this culture that are out of my control and I cannot and will never change but I'll keep moving forward and accept it, learn from it, lean on the Lord, ENJOY IT, and focus on serving God IN SPITE of these differences.
